"What if's" are truly evil. They seem to be haunting me. I'm not feeling very grounded lately which forces me to wonder what I'm doing wrong in life. Am I supposed to be a different place in life at my age? I don't necessarily think so for someone else my age but am beginning to feel the pressures of society becoming a more regular occurrence. People who haven't seen me in a while don't ask about my work or my happiness level with things....only "Are you married yet?" I was demeaned in front of a ton of people last weekend over having standards. Heh ACTUALLY, I was just out dancing and having a good time. I met some guy who was a pretty good dancer so I just went with it without any expectations of giving a shit who he is as a person. Sometimes a girl just wants to dance and enjoy being herself.
What happened was...as I was standing outside waiting for my ride to get there AND saying good night to several people I grew up with or have known forever, this JACKASS loudly states "You're going home with me tonight." with which "Negative Ghost Rider" was the reply. I got not 1 chewing out but 2. I was hearing things like, "I know I have 4 kids. I'm paying $1800 a month for them. You shouldn't worry about it, you'll never see em. They ain't @ my house." In trying to sincerely not be rude, I was saying things like,"If I wanted someone with kids, I'd be married to them already. I don't even know who you are. It's not my fault your fertile and/or irresponsible. Live with your choices." The crazy thing was, I think an old friend was paying attention and just gave me a random hug on the way out.
Given situations like that one, it's easy to see how some things never change. The mentality never changes. Men generally have to be dominant, expect things to come easy, and don't require love to be the priority.
I was also told recently that it's intimidating to flirt/compliment me b/c I'm a "hot blonde" w/a travel job. That's just not fair. I'm about 6 hours from a man that I think is probably amazing. Annnnnd he's easily intimidated. I don't know what to do but this aimlessly wandering thing is getting old. I've got an old soul that's weary. What's a hopeless romantic who wants that fairy tale love story to do in a world of sexual innuendos and misguided expectations of women. Le sigh
What happened was...as I was standing outside waiting for my ride to get there AND saying good night to several people I grew up with or have known forever, this JACKASS loudly states "You're going home with me tonight." with which "Negative Ghost Rider" was the reply. I got not 1 chewing out but 2. I was hearing things like, "I know I have 4 kids. I'm paying $1800 a month for them. You shouldn't worry about it, you'll never see em. They ain't @ my house." In trying to sincerely not be rude, I was saying things like,"If I wanted someone with kids, I'd be married to them already. I don't even know who you are. It's not my fault your fertile and/or irresponsible. Live with your choices." The crazy thing was, I think an old friend was paying attention and just gave me a random hug on the way out.
Given situations like that one, it's easy to see how some things never change. The mentality never changes. Men generally have to be dominant, expect things to come easy, and don't require love to be the priority.
I was also told recently that it's intimidating to flirt/compliment me b/c I'm a "hot blonde" w/a travel job. That's just not fair. I'm about 6 hours from a man that I think is probably amazing. Annnnnd he's easily intimidated. I don't know what to do but this aimlessly wandering thing is getting old. I've got an old soul that's weary. What's a hopeless romantic who wants that fairy tale love story to do in a world of sexual innuendos and misguided expectations of women. Le sigh
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